Saturday, November 7, 2009

The one celebrating 6939 days of living

I am now 19. That's the age between 18 and 20. At this point, Chelsea applauds my ability to count. I am glad the Malaysian primary education system has amounted to something.


Well done Simon. First txt! I hope your imagination worked well during your philosophy exam today XD


Breakfast suprise from Mirren @ 9.32am.


I miss Mirren. Her name reminds me of both a mirror and Martin. However, she is neither.

PHASE ONE
Lunch @ the Botans


Thank you mummy for letting me use the credit card. Unfortunately it now suffers from swipe burn.




Feeding the ducks.
...
Correction.
Duck.


The girl who did the sun-dance which made the sun run away. Probably because she mooned it. But we shan't put those pictures up.

PHASE TWO
Dinner @ Wagamama


Cara and Emma's take on Harajuku.
...
At least they tried.


Weir House dining room tables anyone?


Caitlin, this face is for you.


Look who it is! Again. Sitting on my right! Again. Attempting asian cuisine! Again.
Hayden feels special when I blog about him.
blog blog blog blog blog blog
There.


Trademark dinner picture. Copyright Tab&Fang productions.


Matt: "I'm going to put my pride aside.... and ask for some crayons!"


These are hopefully my friends


An extension of my popularity


More with the 'You're going to blog about me later aren't you?' man


We take too many pictures Fang.
But that's ok, because it is my job to convert the world into asian.
Success.


Dinner!
Matt: "I attack noodles! Attack attack attack!"
Gen: "Amateur."

Dinner was so huge! Plus we had a whole chicken for lunch! My appetite makes people question my gender.
But no fear...

... because Emma a.k.a Honda Wasabi Toyota (Harajuku persona) is here!

Other random but just as important if not more important because they are so cool people at dinner


E1 and E2. Or E2 and E1. Really, I don't judge.
Hey Chelsea, think of 5 counts before J, and then think of what a broom cleans.
!!!!!!!!


My Facebook-deemed-drinking-buddy and Shangus. Liam is being culturally insensitive here.


Smug. Face.


I love Jessie because she helped me pack all day yesterday. We decided that if using her common sense in sociology fails, she shall retire as an Indonesian maid to Japan where many 50-year-old ladies who shower naked will pay her good money.
... to clean.

PHASE THREE
Careless wanderment along the waterfront

All that was left after dinner.
I shall take this opportunity to thank you all for coming.
Even though you had exams.
Or lack of.



Tab: "Matt matt matt, you know what we should do?!"



JUMP SHOT FAIL


The non-participants a.k.a. The Sitters.

PHASE FOUR
Land of the paper ripping



Yes. That does say I <3 SUPER JUNIOR
I think it was Christmas-SuperJunior-alcohol themed
If only I got Super Junior for Christmas....

The internal cognitive dissonance that exists between Tabitha and Tabitha:
"Super Junior is cool"
"You're 19 now"
"I like Hankyung's hair..."
"You're 19 now"
"They're wearing suits!"
"You're 19 now"
"You dress like a 13-year-old though"
"Hey, that's not very nice!"
"That's you saying it. So actually, YOU'RE not very nice"
"That's true..."
"But seriously, you need older-looking clothes"
...

350 days till I'm 20,
T

P.s. I'm back in Christchurch. Please visit.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

The with the proper pre-birthday post

NINETEEN in two and a half hours! ~~

Thanks for all the PRE-WISHES!... and thank you Jono for reminding me of how much I miss everyone :( I want Christchurch now lar!! Also, Ethan'is being silly because he chose summerwork in Dunedin. Silly silly.

Haha even Puan Loo wished me a Happy Birthday XD Over msn wei! My ex-cikgu so hip lah! haha :P Uncle Lawrence oso even use an app on Facebook to wish me haha

I in good mood now! :) When I in good mood right, the Malaysian-ness sure go lahring!! Which reminds me, Maurice is coming back from Aussie!! Got my lahring-friend back lah!! Dem happy!

 Can't wait for SUMMER!




BRING ON NOVEMBER XOX
T

P.s. Hamish, you know our b'day mish, it's at your place right? RIGHT?! lol

The one with halloween, the end of exams, the start of November, and 4 glorious months of summer

Today is an important day in history. Not only has it been 29 years since Antigua and Barbuda gained independence from Britain (I don't know how that is relevant but I just got it off 'todayinhistory.com')

... but...

NO MORE EXAMS NO MORE EXAMS NO MORE EXAMS NO MORE EXAMS NO MORE EXAMS NO MORE EXAMS!

plus...

LAW'S FINISHED FOR THE YEAR LAW'S FINISHED FOR THE YEAR LAW'S FINISHED FOR THE YEAR

including that fact that...

I HAVE 4 MONTHS OF HOLIDAY I HAVE 4 MONTHS OF HOLIDAYS I HAVE 4 MONTHS OF HOLIDAY

and...

MY BIRTHDAY'S TOMORROW MY BIRTHDAY'S TOMORROW MY BIRTHDAY'S TOMORROW MY BIRTHDAY'S TOMORROW MY BIRTHDAY'S TOMORROW MY BIRTHDAY'S TOMORROW!

This could only mean...

YOU CAN STALK MY BLOG AGAIN YOU CAN STALK MY BLOG AGAIN YOU CAN STALK MY BLOG AGAIN

and that...

I'M FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

which means...

I HAVE MY LIFE BACK I HAVE MY LIFE BACK I HAVE MY LIFE BACK!!!


October the 31st marks the start of a whole month of being blisfully ignorant until potentially having to worry about working as a waitress at the cheesecake factory.

 
The end of law equals the start of humanitarian work experiencing what it would feel like to not own a bed.
I would just like to take this moment to thank all those involved for the unflattering tags on Facebook.

Short bye-bye for now. The words aren't flowing. Law stole my soul. Might get it back on December the 7th. Hopefully.

Thank you Lli for providing sustenance today,
T

Saturday, October 24, 2009

The one with sarcasm

I love it when middle-aged American dudes go on Korean variety shows. I love it because their own country felt too superior to nationally broadcast their 'verging-on-'is-that-all-you-can-do?' antics and so these wackadoodles are forced to transport their talent to the continent of many toy factories. I also love their expressions when all the 'cover-mouth-while-giggling' celebrities 'ooooh' and 'ahhhhh' at their 'Enggerish'. I love how these people need this to boost their self-esteem and curb their mid-life anxiety by sporting their beer-belly (which when juxtaposed with SNSD's legs makes you cringe so much you're sporting Lindsay Lohan's wrinkles). But most of love, I love it when they pretend to 'understand the culture' and laugh along to all the jokes (Hello?! Everyone knows you don't speak a word of the language! ... and 'Sarangheyo <3' does not count) and then go back to mummy-country and tell everyone what wackos 'those people' are and that you could never live there because there is just too much disparity in the lifestyles.

Love it.

The one with all the stress

I am here because if I have to read one more thing about Action Potentials my pre-synaptic neurons will exocytosise so much it will be impossible the transporters to perform re-uptakes. Psychology, why did I choose you? Life would  have been so much less painful if I had taken up, oh I dunno, Twitter Studies? This Parietal lobe overload plus the fact that my law notes have been left untouched for the past 2 days is slowly eating away at my sanity.

Talking about eating, I have now developed a new routine where I'm always ravenous at about 3 in the afternoon. Oh the joys of adaptative-exam behaviour! I however, console myself in the fact that all this brain-building can only increase the capicitance of my grey matter.
... That, or my forehead could get bigger. I mean, if my brain was a body, Dr. Patel would be testing it for steroids right now.

Today also marks the first day where I have eaten dinner alone. All alone. Until Fairooz joined me. But before that, for about 5 minutes... I was, all alone. And although I took my Psychology notes down to dinner with me (for the companionship, of course) I could not help but be utterly distracted by a game of 'Would you rather...' going on 3 seats away.

"Ok Jack, now would you rather, have long girly feminine fingernails, like you know, the really long girly ones? Or short stubby fingers"
"But.. I already have short stubby fingers"
"Yea, that's cos you're a guy"
"What's wrong with my fingers?"
" Well, if you were confident enough about your sexuality, you wouldn't mind the girly fingernails Jack..."

OMFG! You expect me to put up with distractions like these whilst trying to cram points about the aftereffects of Amphetamine abuse?
No wait, it gets better!

" Now, ok. Would you rather, lose the tip of a finger? Or be having sex under this dining table, only to be caught out by someone, and that person yells it out to the whole dining room so the whole hall knows?
" Hmmm... I'll have to go with the tip of my finger"
"Ahhh i see... but what if it was a WHOLE finger?"
"Ooohhhh *20 second pause* that IS a hard one...."
 ... and people blame me for being unsociable.



I'm going back to Psyc now. That Long-Term Memory Bank isn't gonna fill up by itself!
T

Thursday, October 22, 2009

The one when Dad's 52

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY <3

Today (apart from being a day of hermitude on my part) marks the 52nd year since Daddy first saw the light! Not 'light' in the religious sense, but 'light' as in when he was expelled from a certain 'dark canal'. Not that anyone knows whether this 'canal' is particularly dark, maybe his one came fitted with a reading lamp. I'm really just guessing here. Anyhooo... moving on.....



Dad's the one on the right
Browsing through my collection has also lead me to infer that I haven't really acquired many photographs with dad. And by 'not many' I mean 'this is the only one'.

On a totally narcissitic note: Look at me!


2007



2009
This would so work if I was under some Witness Protection Programme
...and my real name was something like 'Joyce Wang'

Talking about names, did you know... My dad's name is Jim. Jim Lau.
I think this is a funny name because I only found about this last year.
At the expense of everyone groaning because I've told this story about 145 times because I feel it makes me seem like an entertaining individual, I shall .... not make this the 146th.
At this point, General Shang would say 'So what did you think his name was before? Dad Lau?'
=.=

~*~*~*~*~
On another note, exams are in 5 days!! ... but my celebration of being expelled from my 'dark canal' is in 10! So... Yay Me!

I shall now have to retreat to the conviviality of my cradle,
Again, Happy Birthday Dad! (.. and thank you Mum for reminding me XD God, I am the worst daughter in the world!! )
T

P.s. This post is really for YOUR benefit, in case you would feel so inclined as to send my dad a nice birthday wish. As far as I am concerned, my dad does not read my blog, nor is he familiar with its existence. Unless he's been stalking me. If that's the case....

Hi Dad.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The one with the (semi) malay post

Helo all! Sekarang saya sangat 'beremosi' lah! Nak write blog ini in BM jadi some orang I tak suka tak boleh baca :( My BM so teruk I don't even know where to start! Dictionary pun tak ada! Sudah 6 years I tak cakap/ tulis a single word! This is because tak ada Malaysian friends cakap dengan saya lah. So you will sure laugh at my translation one. But tak apa, because if saya kena buat more law study ... my kepala cannot become more sakit already! Also, minta maaf jikalau saya use German word somewhere, because whenever I need to translate every single word into BM, some German word sure pop-in one!

Ok, so saya punya ujian(s) is in exactly a week! Already so stress nak mati! And somemore my 'budak-budaknya' supposedly 'kawan-kawan' I need to tinggal bersama with tahun depan cannot mencari jalan tengah with our rumah for tahun depan! Buat so manja (in a bad way) that I nak muntah. For goodness sakes man, mengapa I always kena be the one to sort out the billion masalah kamu semua. Everytime kami ada 'mesyuarat' everyone tak boleh compromise. Saya mau buat kawan baik so only shut up and tak cakap apa tapi after when I balik bilik saya I nak menangis and pukul something! But of course cannot lah, because sekarang saya still tingal in an asrama and orang-orang are always in your muka! I need my own ruang sendiri man! Sebap itu I nak tinggal in my own rumah tahun depan, bukan dengan 3 ratus other people who think they lebih baik and can take advantage because saya punya Inggeris lebih buruk daripada yours! WTH! Just because you orang 'tempatan' and saya punya pelat different you think I cannot cakap is it?! For your information, saya tak balah with you because I know you sure tak boleh tengok dari perspective saya kerana kamu semua so sheltered dalam negara ini! Anyway, I digress lah XD

Today I got to berjumpa with my law mentor, which is probably kali terakhir because she nak pergi South Africa next year buat some voluteer work. Tapi saya boleh memberitahu dia semua saya punya masalah and also boleh escape asrama ini for a few hours, nice break lah! Dia kata that saya should stop tolak ansur with setiap orang sebap seriously, i am membaziring my days just so sedih about my current predicament, nak belajar pun tak boleh! Sekarang saya hanya nak balik Christchurch. Cuti please come soon! Tak ada tenaga atau niat lagi...


My hadiah for her :) bau like heaven I tell you! She really malu after lah haha, saying stuff like 'so silly'... 'ohhhh' 'awwwww....' so I memang happy now! lol

Bagaimana juga, I kena pergi belajar now... huhu all my periksa tidak lama lagi! Terima kasih for putting up with semua my keluhan. I harap the next dua minggu laju-laju selesai okie :P

Malay fail,
T

P.s. You may start pointing and laughing now. Or just buy me a dictionary.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

The one with Jen in the big city

1 month ago...

Tab: Hey jen, guess what? It's September now. Like you know, the month after August... before October? Jen: OMG! I cannot believe I'm the last one to go and visit my uber beautiful and perfect friend Tabitha up in Wellington! She is so fantastically gorgeous and smart and funny and I can't believe I haven't gone to visit her yet!! I'm soooo cooooming!!!
*Conversation might have been slightly altered

1 month later...

Wasah!


Jen's displacement from Christchurch to Wellington.


Asians and the City
Although the above is a play on the popular American shit-show, i would like to mention that I do not condone it in any way and if we were in Antarctica, its intense sexual nature would be somewhere near Greenland.

Day 1

Today was Day 1. Some people might call it Thursday, but calling it Day 1 gives off a kind of 007 feel which increases the much needed production of catecholamine in our adrenals glands, in order for us to maximise productivity during Jennifer's short rendezvous.

Today, we...


...visited Law School
Aiyoh, I ho leng of an asian tourist right??! So jakunified in front of my own building maan!
This made us go like...

Wahlau! Total jakunness!

We also...

...had the world's best cookie hot chocolate
This made us go like...

Wahlau! It's so yummmmyyyy!

We also...

...read?
*looking around for security*
We are totally studious dude =.=
This made us go like...

WHATEVER!!!

... but we almost tricked ya!



... second-hand book-dealer say WHAT?!

We also...

chatted up a nice guy :)
Turned out he got on Medusa's bad side
which made us go like...


scaaarynyeeee...
Notice the product placement of the apple.


Day 2

... which came after Day 1. Some people might call it Friday but doing so would just create an environment of inconsistency.
Today, we...

... got a ride into town


Old lady on cable car: Do you girls want me to take your picture?
Girls: Do yo want us to take YOUR picture?!

We also...

sang in the rain...


posed in the rain...
Ngo ho narcissist one!

There was much liquid precipitation today, but fortunately the great minds of the Wellington developers thought about putting up cute little asian restaurants to cater to the haters of atmospheric condensation.

It's only our first meal! Dunno what to eat lah! Aiyoh! How can?!


Tab: Hey jen, you know what's a good device to reduce cheek puffyness?


What is this translucent brittle solid substance before me?

We also stumbled upon several land-dwellers who were expressing their relatively overt reaction to Parliament's action (or inaction) to climate change


We saw them...


We joined them...

Guy behind Jen: WOOOOH! SAVE THE PLANET! WE CAN DO IT GUYS!
*turns to Jen* I LOVE YOU MAN!
.. .. .. ..
We ran away from them...

... and realised that some 5-year-olds were let loose on the National Library


Tab: Jen, I think we're sitting in front of a building with dots.
Jen: Yes, Tab. Yes we are.

Sleeping Art


Walking Art


Standing Art


Leaning Art




Contemplating Art

And in the end...

Jen: Omg Tab! This gelato is amazing! A-MAHZING! Tab! Tab? Tab.... tab...


Person who is enjoying Wellington too much say what?!

Later that night...

Tab: I feel like yoghurt + I like the corridor = Having yoghurt in the corridor.


Ms. I'm-too-full-yea-right joining Ms. I-mixed-alcohol-with-the-yoghurt-but-don't-tell-anyone

*~*~*~The effects of vodka-inspred yoghurt*~*~*~

One

So.... faaarrr......

Two

Jen, I wanna get Maaaaaarrrrriiieeedddd!!
Three

My flexibility is rooted in my genetic predisposition
Day 3


That one behind my fliend my hall you know! Ho beautiful right? Kamu sangat jealous i know lor! That glass room my common room you know! Never mind, you datang sini you boleh stay with me! Sure can one!

Breakfast @ Mojo


Lunch @ QQ


Fernijer! Why you go back so soon! I very miss you lah! I oso just watched Year One yesterday... alone! Sorry I fell asleep during the movie before ay, I was so very tired naaa! But Year One hen funny right? Michael Cera is ganz lustig!

Letter to Jnf no.2

Dear Jennifer,

I express much gratitude for your presence just before I have to relinquish all social interaction with the unescapable looming of study week. I'm repentant over the slight Saturday-morning over-eating scare but at least that's one thing of your 'Things to do before I die' list. I also apologise for making us sound like drunk-twats by telling the duty RA that "it could not be due to alcohol because we haven't had any YET" at 8.30 in the morning. In my defense I don't really drink and therefore am not well-versed in suitable drinking times.

On the bright side, your approval of my room has also considerably fueled my ego - a part of my psyche I have been trying to heal since Xin May's disregard for its mint condition. I also hope that you have not spiraled down into obesity since our 3-day food spree, and that Marco will not disown you. He has not texted me back since Saturday and I hope he does not hate me.

Although you did not fill-out the evaluation form regarding your stay I hope you had a good time and enjoyed being smiled and yelled at by Blanket Man. I hope you enjoyed your pre-exam holiday and that your essay on homosexuality goes well and that your Psychology lecturer is realeased from her mental institution.

Regards
I'm emo now because you left,
T






Tuesday, October 13, 2009

The one from Saturday to Tuesday

You know you've accomplished something when you've endured through 5 days without being able to virtually package yourself to the world. 2 words. Big. Whoop.

Due to a lack of creative story-telling, the following shall be discolsed in 13-year-old-pre-pubescent mode:

Dear Diary,
Today I had my last internal assessment FOR THE YEAR! It was my German aural test and I got to dress up as a salesman and everything! I think it is becaue I'm so great that my lecturers only asked me ONE question at the end when we were supposed to be 'conversing' for FIVE whole minutes. I was sooooo stoked! After that, I came home. And then, like, I ate. And then, like, my nail broke! But like, thank god, a cute boy totally winked at me, omygawd hehehehehehe I am sooooo pretty.... 

=.=

... that last part didn't actually happen. It was a stab at the ostensible 'ditzy' plague that permeates much of popular culture. Thank you Paris Hilton.


Mmmm... conservative...

In other news, the sun has finally descended on our humble dwellings. Not, however, before wrecking the last Weir-event of the year - BBQ Day.

Reasons why BBQ Day was not BBQ Day:
  1. It was raining.
  2. There wasn't actually a BBQ, just sausages cooked in the kitchen.
  3. There were only sausages.
  4. Entertainment was a jelly-pool and a bouncy Twister-pit.

This is a jelly pool. People 'play-wrestle' in it. 'Play-wrestling' is our way of beating up our 'friends' while saying that it's all 'fun and games'.
Jelly pools aren't very appealing when it's 2 degrees outside.

 
This is the Twister-pit. Whoever thought of filling stuff up with air is a genius. However, people hardly played Twister and instead used this idiot-proof device to exude manliness by attempting to crack each other's skulls. Manliness in this case being an euphemism for inanity and 'uhhh.. I need to work off my beers dude...'


 These are people in general.
I am not among these people, because us party-poopers decided to skip to jelly-infested-corridors fest for coffee at Gloria Jeans :)

*swoosh swoosh swoosh*

If you didn't know what that was, it was an attempt at time-travel special effects, because it is now Tuesday.

Shangy's recent purchase of a certain european jumper inspired me to indulge in some retail therapy of my own. Although my excuse was a reward for completing German for the year. Ooh, good one.


This is Paper Bag Princess.
I love Opshops because it complies with my materialistic nature without sacrificing my parsimonious disposition.
I also love this particular one because it doesn't smell (that much) of old ladies' feet.

But just as I was leaving (...ominous music playing...)
I stumbled (yea right) onto this petite & quaint little shop. You know, just casually...
This lead to chatting with the owner for about 50 minutes. I must say that she played her part very well, sucking up to the customer (me) while pointing out possible articles that would be most flattering (I.e. the entire shop).


 Today's total harvest :)
And I only told Shangy about the skirt and a top...
SURPRISE!!!



The lady obviously felt some long lost asian bond between us, because she realised that she should repay my business in the form of this 'gift'. Her reason being the fact that I was a 'cute, little student'.
Ooh, good one. There's 5 bucks she won't be getting back.

I am amused by my spending spontaneity,
T

Thursday, October 8, 2009

The one with the interview

Thursday, 8/10/2009, 6.59am...
Professor Umbridge chasing me down Hogwarts hallowed halls... multi-coloured zaps streaming in every direction...
That's right. I have geeky dreams. Sue me. Too bad Siwon doesn't visit :P

Thursday, 8/10/2009, 7.00am...
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEEEEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEP
Huh? What? Oi, where did they fat lady in the pink suit go?
 *Checks clock* For Auntie Getrude's sake, it's fuppin 7! I'm going back to bed...
*Gains consciousness* For Uncle Berni's sake, I have me a breakfast date at 8! I'm going to have a shower...
P.s. You know it's too early to detach your being from the pillow when you use the conditioner before shampooing, realise it's not foaming up, so put more conditioner in, realise after 3 repetitions that you've used up half the bottle of conditioner, meaning that you have to use half the bottle of shampoo to wash it off, and then proceed to grab some nail-polish remover instead of face-wash...

This morning, being the earliest I've gotten up in 2009, (Yes, I'm a spoilt brat who doesn't live on a farm where the rooster throws a spaz at 5 every morning) was Llinos' "we're-making-up-for-the-fact-you-were-sick-on-your-birthday-so-we're-taking-you-out-to-breakfast-today" day.


These are our presents.
Correction: These are our presents... to Llinos.
Llinos herself is not a present.
We got her:

  1. A duck key-chain + A duck stress-ball (Except it wasn't a ball. It was a duck). Llinos gets the duck-motive. We are pleased.


  2. A Me-to-You bear snowglobe. Llinos collects snowglobes of cities. This is her first snowglobe that is not a tourist destination. This is because friendship is the final destination. Wakaka.


  3. We also made her a card. Actually, The Shangness made the card. When she is not ambushing little girls wearing red-hoods in the forest, she dabbles in craft.



Tabitha: *shuffling*
Jenny: Hmph... Taaaabitha, would YOU like a picture with the presents?
Tabitha: Oh, I don't want to intrude...
Jenny: Well ok then.
Tabitha: No no, I want one I want one!


Teehee :)

Breakfast... (Yay, no white toast with chocolate-flavoured ricies!) They can't even give us proper coco-pops, sheesh!

Jenny suggested Mojo. She likes Mojo because it has a rather funky name for a cafe which is not derogatory, like that other one - 'Weoverworkchildrenfromunprivilegedbackgrounds'.

Not this Mojo...


This Mojo!






As you can see, General Shang and me ordered the same eggs-benedict.
We both also ordered a mocha.
The General was displeased with this similarity, and thinks that I should stop copying her.
In the words of Ruth O'Bower... 'Pffft!!!'
P.s. There is no Ruth O'Bower. I made her up. Aren't I clever? Teehee


J&L not only ordered the same thing, they obviously synchorinised on hair and outfit as well. You don't hear them complaining. They embrace uniformity. Mao will be proud.

Today was my CAMPUS COACHES interview!! I wrote that in red because they provide red t-shirts. That was clever. Must be all that life experience and that fact that I have an un-crappy personality!
I thought it went well... really well...  But I shouldn't be too hopeful.
Too late! heh...
I took 32 minutes deciding what to wear. People turned up in hoodies.

I find out next week XD Eeep!

Today was almost scandalous,
T